CAROLYN S. STARK Oct 19,1928 – Apr 17,2025

Sadly, we announce the passing of our mother Carolyn Stark age 96 on April 17,2025.

She was born October 19,1928 in Olean, NY to parents Clifford C Steffenhagen and Marion S Steffenhagen.  She was raised in the small town of Machias, 50 miles from Buffalo NY. She has 2 older brothers, Theodore and Bruce.

As a child Carolyn was petite, timid and quiet.  A fairy like towheaded little girl with blue eyes. She liked Shirley Temple, playing with paper dolls, Clark Gable, and the Wizard of OZ.

There were many stories of tagging along with her brothers to explore the fields or wade “up the crick” Her father was a mailman for the area, and she would ride in the horse and buggy when he delivered mail in the surrounding countryside. If it was winter, it would be a sleigh ride. The town school was just a hike across the pasture.  Classes were from first grade through high school.

Two events were devastating in her childhood. Her brother Bruce, age 12, became a victim of the Polio epidemic causing lifelong paraplegia. He spent several years separated from the family to be treated in Buffalo causing financial and emotional stress. Visitation was limited and we were told our grandmother hitchhiked to the city sometimes. Despite this Bruce became a successful artist, and drove himself to California, married and had 2 sons.  My mother was very proud of Bruce.

The second event was the loss of her brother Theodore (Ted) at age 18 from a gun accident.

My mother attended school during WWII. She loved singing and took lessons and after high school sang with a group on radio in Buffalo. It was post WWII and the guys and gals were thinking about settling down. She met Henry Giaconelli at a dance. She was the only one at the table who wouldn’t drink. She’s the only one who called him Henry, not “Hank”.  Petite, pretty, small town girl and handsome veteran of Italian descent, well, the rest was history. They married on 7/25/1948, waited a while, then she put aside her singing to start their family. They raised three children, Louis, Joyce and Alan. She was a 50,s housewife and made sure it all ran smoothly. Ladylike and dressed well and reserved with a smile.  Her homemade spaghetti sauce was as good as her mother-in-law.

Life has many chapters.  After 25 years she was single again, her children were grown, and she reinvented herself. She relocated to Southern California to be close to her children. She went to night classes and worked as an Xray Technician.  She bought a condo in La Habra, made friends, became a grandmother and started dating. She had been single about 10 years. She met Max Stark. Max had an outstanding career as an engineer with significant involvement with NASA the space shuttle programs and stealth bomber to name just a few. He doted on her and she was his supporting companion in all his many interests and endeavors.  They were truly devoted to each other. She was right in tune with Max’s sense of humor.  They married 08/30/1986 and lived in La Habra before moving to Wildomar after retirement. They traveled worldwide and enjoyed each other’s company to the fullest.

After 25 wonderful years Max passed away in 2012. In the years alone she joined a genealogy group, still was an avid walker into her 80’s, did her crossword puzzles and always loved  reading and music. She had her hair done every week!

As she became more frail and memory and eyesight declined, she was able to still enjoy when grand and great grandchildren came to visit. She would sometimes say softly” Max was sooo good to me”.  We are happy she could stay in her own home in her final years where her best memories were. Though sad, we find peace that our mother is with her beloved Max.

Survived by:  Children , louis Giaconelli ( Marisa dec); Joyce Giaconelli (spouse Tim Brenner); Alan Giaconelli; (wife Pam). Six Grandchildren (plus one deceased); Three great grandchildren, two nephews

Preceded in death by parents Clifford Steffenhagen and Marion Steffenhagen; Spouse Max Stark; Henry Giaconelli (Div); brothers Theodore Steffenhagen; Bruce Steffenhagen; grandson Lucas Giaconelli( son of Louis and Marisa); Marisa Giaconelli ( wife of Louis)

A family and friends memorial service will take place May 8. 2025 from 10 AM to 12N in the chapel at the Murrieta Valley funeral home, 24651 Washington Ave, Murrieta, CA, 92562

Final resting place will be at the Wildomar Cemetery 21400 Palomar St 92595.

In lieu of flowers you may make a donation to a children’s charity or children’s hospital of choice.